seriously contemplating marriage preparations(courtship),serious analysis needs to be done before you finally go ahead.
It's not much fun to realize the person you care about (and once even thought you might want to marry) is constantly keeping score. It begins to feel as though you'll never "pass Go" as if you can never make it and
that you are not really heading nowhere in this kind of relationship. But love shouldn't be a Monopoly game.
There needs to be plenty of room for each partner to stretch, and grow. Gluing two separate people together is not just symbiotic but potentially dysfunctional.Hence there is need for you to know what signs will tell you surely that your relationship is healthy or sick
So, how do you view your own relationship, to measure just how healthy it is? After evaluating whether you're mostly happy and content, or mostly sad and worried, you might want to consider the basic ingredients or characteristics -- all right, call them Strengths -- of a healthy relationship, as follows:
(1) What each of us expects from the other is fair and realistic.Not based on what others think we should be.
(2) We are happy with one another, as we are.Happiness despite our present situation and also mutually satisfied with each other's personal affairs.
(3) Each of us listens to the other, and cares.
(4) There is ample room for each of us to have a separate life/self. We know we are two separate people who choose to be together and grow/nurture a wonderful, loving relationship.
(5) We can argue or disagree, and remain friends.
(6) Each of us has come to rely on the other, because we value our relationship as a top priority.
(7) Mutual communication and sharing is valued by each of us.
(8) Neither of us must be something or someone other than what we are, to please the other.
(9) Total honesty is a shared value, as well as kindness and sensitivity toward one another's feelings.
(10) Our relationship works well now, not as an unfulfilled goal to be hoped for in the future.
(11) We are both committed to the relationship, and to one another. Neither of us threatens to leave.
(12) We love and care for one another, unconditionally
How many of those strengths does your relationship have? Remember, if yours seems to be lacking, it's not necessarily time to end it all -- because every relationship or marriage can be improved.It does not mean that you have failed or that you are a failure. if both parties are willing to work together to achieve that goal.
Don't settle for mediocre, when you can shoot for and really have Miraculous!
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